Does this fur make me look fat?
May 21st, 2008
Filed in: 7
My dogs are overweight.
Zeke is “thick”, but Sumner is downright “three doughnuts too many” pudgy.
Dogs should have a well-defined waistline – you’ve seen the drawings in your vet’s office.
One dog looks like he should be riding in the back of a van on “Animal Cops Miami,” one dog has that coveted hourglass waistline, and the other dog looks like Sumner.
Want proof?
#1: This is where his waist should curve in. Nope, no curve there. The guy has a torso like a beer can.
#2: Not only is there no curve, he actually has a roll that hangs over his leg when he sits! Ah, sweetie, there’s just more of you to love!
#3: Two words: neck rolls.
Ok, I know that my dog is chubby, so what am I going to do about it?
First, I need to get over my eyesight issues. The problem is that when I look at him, I just don’t see the chub. It doesn’t register. To me, he still looks like a sleek, gorgeous year-old boxer. I guess I need to take off my rose-colored glasses and admit that my show-stopping pup is now a thick, middle-aged dog, with skin tags and age spots.
Maybe this blog can function like those tabloid magazines … I’ll post pictures of him looking chubby and you can write in and say things like, “Ugh, he’s so fat! Step away from the sandwich!” or “Return of the blob!” Then I’ll be so embarrassed that I’ll be forced to send him to Promises, and write it off as a getaway to combat “exhaustion.”
Then he’ll come out looking fabulous, do an interview with Barbara Walters and a spread in People Magazine, and blame me for enabling his food addiction.
Tags: Sumner
